Sometimes I need reminding of what is really important in life. Friday afternoon I was full of stress and frustration, worried about things that were fully and totally beyond my control.
And Friday I had a conversation with a fiend who is just as frustrated in a similar way. We both discussed our need to do our jobs when we were at work and to not let our work impact the rest of our lives. Work to live not live to work. Because the truth of the matter is that it doesn’t matter how hard I work. It doesn’t matter how many hours I put in every day. Because it’s still going to be there. And the people who aren’t pulling their weight are going to continue to not pull their weight. I cannot change them. I cannot force responsibility on others. I cannot force wok ethic on those who have none.
All I can do is the best I can. Give each day the beset of my ability.Work to the best of my ability. Be honest in my interactions with others. Treat others the way I want to be treated. And go home knowing it will be there for me the next day.
And in that I cannot take on the stress and stress and frustrations of others. They must make their own peace. They’ve got to come to their own decisions. I deal poorly enough with my own stress; I can’t handle theirs. I cannot be responsible for the decisions that others make as a result of the frustration they are experiencing. I can empathize with them. I can give them some guidance. I can give them support. But I can’t make the decisions for them.
So that’s the decision I made Friday night. From that point on, I’ve been at peace. This has been one of the best weekends we’ve had in a long time. We had a lovely dinner with the family Friday night. Saturday we picked out bedraggled plants to join our growing garden, and then spent hours with good friends re-connecting. Today we slept through the storms, lazing in bed until almost noon. We got up and had a lovely brunch before heading out into the yard to put all of those new plants to bed.
I did not once worry over what would happen Monday at work. Not once did I even think about work. I was too busy enjoying the all of the wonder of this life I get to live. This evening, I’ve experienced some angst but only because all of this amazingness is ending. Not because of what I’m going to face tomorrow at work. It’s just stuff tomorrow at work. I’m going to go to work and deal with it and then I’m going to come home and enjoy my life with my husband. Just like this weekend.
Life is good, but it is entirely too short. It is especially too short to live it consumed by and worried about things I can’t change or control. So I’m working on changing the thing I can…which is me.