I have long said that I would almost rather there be no breaks in teaching – just let me work straight through and take a break as I need it. One of the hardest things is getting back into the groove. Hence this weekend unwind post – which is being written at 11:40 on a Sunday night rather than earlier in evening.
We were well on our way to another one of those epic Gulf Coast weekends – where everything is golden and bright, even if the weather outside is terrible. And it was terrible this weekend. See the grey skies behind the boat? That’s what Saturday looked like in between bouts of severe thunderstorms.
No mind, though, Sweet Husband and I got out to run some errands, and he took me for oysters. He knows that good seafood is the way to my heart. The little sports bar next to our landlord’s office had a special – $0.50 each so we ordered two dozen and went to town. They were the fattest, juiciest, loveliest oysters I’ve had all season.
We did a little shopping – wandering in and out of the local salvage stores (and taking nothing home with us) before heading to Sam’s so we could get prepared for a week of healthy eating. And when we got home, we were wonderfully lazy as we watched football and enjoyed cocktails – knowing it was really our last night before reality intruded.
And reality did intrude. It’s hit me like a ton of bricks today. I had to go to the grocery store to pick up a few last minute things to prepare my healthful dinners for the week, and while there, the anxiety was overwhelming. I almost left everything and came home. I don’t suffer from anxiety too often, but when it comes, it’s pretty terrible. It’s not incapacitating like I know it can be fore many people; I’m still able to function, but I feel like the world is ending.
That anxiety didn’t really leave me all day long. A close Dallas Cowboy’s football game didn’t help matters. I’ve gotten my bag packed, and the lunches are ready. I need to do the work that I should have already gotten done. I need to get a shower. Perhaps this is anxiety fueled, but I kinda feel like I’m just gonna go ahead and stay up all night long. Who needs sleep, right? The times I need to get up would be about when I’ve crawled into bed this week, so why not?
(I’m kidding, Sner. Just kidding. Because she’s going to read that and chastise me. On Facebook, she’s already told me a couple of times to go to bed)
The anxiety has pretty much ruined this last day. I guess because he recognized that I’m struggling today, SH said we didn’t have to take the tree down; he would take care of it this week.
I’m hoping that the coming week will dispel this terrible dread that is tightening my chest, and to help make that happen, it’s time to think about the weekly intentions.
I think it’s time to get back to thinking in categories, but to shake things up a little, I’m going to use my Core Desired Feelings as the categories.
- Begin Alexandra Franzen’s Letter Writing Project
- Comment on others’ Instagram photos instead of just liking them
- Make better use of Buffer
- Read for at least 2 hours this week
- Complete the photo challenges I’m taking part in
- Clean the house
- Practice my affirmations for the coming year
- Create my Vision board for my Word of the Year
- Create my vision cards for the quarter
- Clean out kitchen cabinets
- Walk for 30 minutes each day
- Take my medications the way they are supposed to be taken
- Eat (& drink) healthfully
- Complete my morning pages
- Finish crocheted scarf
I didn’t plan for there to be 3 things in each of the categories, although I like that symmetry. While I don’t want to jinx it, I’m already setting myself up to be successful with several of these. When I first looked at the list, it felt overwhelming – lots of things to accomplish this week – but when I think about how I want to *feel* and how those things move me closer to that feeling, the less taxing these things seem.
I hope your 2015 is off to a rousing start! What will you be working on this week? Do you have plans related to goals for 2015 or your word of the year?