I am tired and out of sorts.
I should be working on my lesson plans for the week but I’ve decided to get up early and get those taken care of then. Always a good plan. I’ve downloaded everything I need for them. Just haven’t written them up in anyway that makes sense. Or at all. Which is fantastic.
It was a good weekend. There was friend time (The Man in Black at the Hard Rock, Uncle Joe’s Nuclear Meltdown Wing Challenge – done by sweet husband, not me) & there was us time (Bay Bridge Fest, Sunday breakfast & football). We laughed, we drank, we talked, we danced in the street. Memories to go into our Good Things box (which I really need to update. There’s a lot that needs to go in there).
I bookended the weekend with bouts of snaggliness. As I was driving home Friday, I worried about whether the water bill had been paid. I’m not paying the bills so I didn’t know. And when I called, there was no answer. Which irritated me. And I made that clear when I got home to find it had in fact been paid. So I got something else to be angry about because why waste a good mad–or hormone surge–when it rears its head. At one point, while he was reclining on the bed before we met friends for dinner, he said to me, “Now you’re gonna need to quit being mean to me. I haven’t seen you in days & you don’t even tell me you missed me? Stop being mean.”
& then again today when the house wasn’t as clean as I thought it should be. I’m not the best housekeeper but I’ve always taken pride in being “messy not dirty” but today…I couldn’t handle that we had crossed that line. So I was a little less diplomatic about it than I could have been.
I was just about to say, “In my defense,” but there’s really no excuse. I know better. But…there was a dead bug on the nightstand, and a week old mess in the sink, and god knows what on the floor. And it needed to be dealt with.
But with a little more grace than I mustered.
So here I am, struggling with needing to say I’m sorry and I’m an hour away. I can always text or call but it feels like an in-person kinda thing.
So for this week, my intentions are:
I’m hoping to get myself back together or at least get started on it.