March 2011

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March 2011

March 20, 2011

Evening Update

I have to get to bed because the week is starting sooner than I want it to. I need to get to bed because I need to get up early to prepare for the week. Of course, I haven't done anything that I need to do. That's OK because I can get it done in the morning before it has to be done.

It was a beautiful weekend. The weather was perfect. I got out with the doggie today and enjoyed our time in the sunshine. I think tomorrow we'll try to run. I don't know how long it will last for me, but I'm going to try. It's been a month since I last ran. The doggie has apparently found the little bit of weight that I've lost. She needs to get out and get in the sunshine and run. I need to do that too.

I think my weight loss can be attributed to the lack of drinking. for some reason I haven't been too interested in it as of late, which is strange, giving the stress levels. That's usually when I want to have a cocktail. Whatever. I'll take it.

I realized this evening that I have 2.5 months. That means I've really got to work on getting things sorted and packed. I think if each week between now and then I take a different room and get it organized and packed, then I'll be OK. This week, I think I'm going to tackle the bathrooms. I'll get rid of some of the stuff that doesn't need to be hanging around. Go and get a couple of boxes that I can get ready. I suppose that bathrooms are an odd place to start, but they're small. Manageable. I guess I could do the spare room. That's easy enough. I also need to start going through the kitchen.

Have I mentioned that I'm getting rid of the plastic in my kitchen? I'm going to glass food storage. Plastics are bad for us. Very, very bad. So I'm getting rid of mine. Each pay day, I buy a few more pieces of glass.

I've got to get ready for bed. Which means drying my hair. More tomorrow y'all.

March 16, 2011

Evening Update

My dress for Oaks arrived today. My Sner made it for me, and I have to say...it's fantastic! She did a very good job, and it's fantastic. I think that pattern would make a very good LBD. She's making me another one with a white background, floral pattern. If she were feeling ambitious, she could do a black one too. Just sayin'...

Now for Oaks I just have to find a pair of shoes and decide upon the jewelry I want to wear. I also have to get the make-up situation taken care of. And the hair. I need to go see a professional and let them color my hair since it's such a mess. Maybe I'll do that over spring break. Go see someone that I don't have to explain things to because I'll never see them again. Hmmmmm...

Tomorrow is the last day of the afterschool reading program. Praise Jesus. I've enjoyed the extra paycheck, but I won't miss all of the extra work. To be honest, I phoned it in a bit this week. I didn't intend to, but then I just couldn't make myself do it.

I am beginning to fear that I am truly entering menopause. I woke up this morning at 1:00 drenched in sweat. It took at least half an hour for the overwhelming burning to go away.

Matt and I were talking about camping on the beach during spring break, but I can't find a campground on the beach. *sigh* I want to go to the beach more than I want to go camping. I do want to go camping, though. Before it gets ungodly hot. But I don't think that's going to happen this spring. We'll have to go this fall because we know that camping can't happen in the summer. We learned that last year.

March 15, 2011

Evening Update

I should be in the bed because I haven't done my work for tomorrow. I'm going to get up early and do it, but I haven't gone to bed yet.

Today was a better day than I expected it to be. I am always surprised when I'm in front of a classroom full of kids and it goes well. I'm never sure of what I'm doing and how it's going to work, but today it was a good day. I'm glad. I need those experiences. This year...the ugliness of it...has robbed me of confidence. But there are moments like today and yesterday when I realize that hey...I really do know what I'm doing. I'm not a total and complete fuck up here.

I had a big conversation with my boss today. I needed to tell him that I wasn't sure about my plans for next year before someone else did. He took it better than I thought he might. I hope that the goodwill holds because to be honest, I need it. I need that support right now when I don't know what's going to happen or where I'm going to go.

So overall...today was a win, to quote Charlie Sheen. I can't wait, however, to be home in 17 days. I'm going to relax, go to the beach, spend time with my girlfriends, get a new tattoo and spend time in New Orleans. What more could I ask for from a spring break?

March 11, 2011

Evening Update

Today was a better day. I was afraid that it was going to be awful, but it was actually really good. I think part of that might have been due to the fact that I got really, really good news about the project that I'm trying to get off the ground. Y'all think good thoughts about it because it's gonna be huge.

The news today has been dominated by news of the Japanese earthquake and tsunami. It is such a terrible tragedy that could easily be compounded. I think every one is most worried about the nuclear reactors that are in danger of core meltdown. Nuclear energy is safe and clear...under most circumstances. I believe that. We've had a few spectacular disasters, and to be sure, those disasters were disasters of epic proportion. There is no denying that, but there are hundreds of nuclear plants that work effectively and safely every day. There is no threat and no danger posed by them.

I don't know how you plan for what happened to do. They had off-site power. The secondary generators were off-site. But both the earthquake and then the tsunami overwhelmed those systems and back-ups. It's a waiting game. Tragedy upon tragedy upon tragedy.

My books arrived today! I think I'm going to use them to work with the boys next week, since I'm supposed to be planning the lessons. That's fine with me. I don't care about that part of it. I'm sure that I'm going to come up with something pretty cool. But whether other people feel the same way about it or not is another story. I'm going to try to not worry about it.

It's going to be a pretty weekend! The doggie and I are going to have plans! I'm excited about it. I'm also going to finish my Oaks hat. It's a month and a half away, but I want things taken care of and out of the way. I still need the shoes to go with the dress. I need to find a pin for the hip. I've got to get my bracelet cleaned.

March 10, 2011

Evening Update

Both of my goals for Lent are proving to be incredibly difficult. Once again I am not writing in my notebook. Maybe it doesn't really matter where I write, just that I write. I still don't know really what to write about it. Thinking. Thinking. Thinking.

The not bitching about my job is even harder. I slipped today. I'm still seething about what happened. Trying to let it go, but it has some uses. I have been cleaning. The floors have been swept and mopped which is big for me. I don't mind sweeping, but I hate mopping. So much so that I considered paying the lady who used to watch the cats (she cleaned houses for a living) to come in once a month to mop and dust. It would have been about $25. I think it would have been worth it, but who hires a cleaning lady for a dumpy apartment? The toilets have been cleaned, and the bathroom counters wiped down. The laundry is almost done, and what is finished is put away...although not ironed. Pretty sure that one will come back to bite me. All of that work? Due the white-hot anger I'm still feeling over something that happened at 10:15 this morning. *sigh*

But that's all I'm going to say about it.

I'm either going to be slightly cured of my pessimism and negativity at the end of 40 days, or I'm going to be an alcoholic.

My books still aren't here. I called amazon to inquire as to where my things where since the tracking they provided said that my books were still in Cincinnati. Long story short, the package left Cincinnati today and should be here in three days. Whaaaaaat?!?! I was bitchy enough that I now have a $10 credit at amazon. Wonder what I will spend it on?

It was snowing when I drove home from work today, which was a little startling. I know it's only March, and technically that means that we're still in the middle of winter. But ugh. Snow? Now? The upside is that we're supposed to have a lovely weekend. I've got a ton of things to do...as usual...but I'm hoping to get out and enjoy it just a little. Maybe take the doggie for a walk around the lake. I almost said take the doggie for a hike, but we are water-logged, which means that a hike would be a slippery, muddy mess.

I'm going to bed. More tomorrow night after I've cleaned of the dining room table and the couch, vacuumed, and dusted. Then my house will be clean and all I will really need to do for spring cleaning is scrub the baseboards because when I was looking at them this evening...they are gross.

March 9, 2011

Evening Update

Today is the first day of Lent. Even though I am not observant, I like the idea of setting a goal for one's self and following through. In thinking about my life, I realize that there are things I could practice eliminating from my life and things I could add. So. For the next 40 days, I'm subtracting one thing from my life and I'm adding one thing.

I won't be bitching about my job until Easter, and I hope that I will be broken of that habit. Not bitching about it doesn't mean that I don't still hate it and that there aren't a million little deaths every day. It just means that whinging about it doesn't change it, and it gets tiresome. I tend to the negative, and the situation at my job makes it incredibly easy for me to go even further down that road. Today was the first test because from the start, today could have been like any other day. I still thought it, but I didn't give voice to it. The only one tortured by the difficulty of the day was me, and I'm hoping that by the time Lent is over, I won't be torturing even myself. Hopefully in 40 some odd days, I will be able to stop myself before I even go there. (I won't even complain about the job here)

So that's the thing that I'm letting fall away, which brings us to the thing that I'm adding to my life in the coming days. I've thought about what I really wanted to do, what I've been missing, what I need. Two weekends ago, I went by one of the local Borders that is going out of business. I was able to pick up 3 of the notebooks that I prefer to write in for 40% off. I probably should have bought more, and I think I'll swing by there again this weekend to see what's still left. It struck me as I was picking up those notebooks that I don't write any more. I don't know what I do, but I don't write.

So. From now until Easter, I'm planning to write every day. At least three pages in my notebook each day. Except today. Today I'm writing here because I needed to line things out a little bit. I needed to put my plans out there into the world. Provide myself with some accountability. And perhaps some support. And I didn't really know what to write about today.

I ordered a couple of books from Amazon last week; one of them anticipating getting back into writing and needing some thoughts to spur me. I'm rusty I think. Those books aren't here yet. I'm not quite sure what to write about tonight. I have a lot of thoughts about the way teachers are being treated in this country right now, but I don't know if I want to invite negativity into my life. Maybe tomorrow night.

It has rained all night and all day. I'm hoping that is what is contributing to my extreme fatigue. When I got home, I literally fell asleep in my chair eating my dinner snack. I took an hour nap and should head back to the bed now, but I wanted to see what John Stewart has to say tonight. He's had some pretty insightful commentary the last couple of weeks. I also think the changed weather must be at the root of the incredible headache I've had all day. It was vision-altering that was so bad, and I have been nauseous all day long. I need to take something again now and remember to use my neti pot in the morning.

I am ready for the rain to be over. I have a brand new camera that I'm dying to take out for a spin. I won't be buying another camera for quite some time. Even though I have no idea how to really use all of its fabulous features, I can't wait to play with it. It's a hybrid, which means that it's a P&S with a super zoom. Options to do manual and automatic focus. Lots of different features to use for pictures, and I want to get really proficient at using the thing.

Last Updated April 17, 2011

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March 20, 2011

Evening Update

I have to get to bed because the week is starting sooner than I want it to. I need to get to bed because I need to get up early to prepare for the week. Of course, I haven't done anything that I need to do. That's OK because I can get it done in the morning before it has to be done.

It was a beautiful weekend. The weather was perfect. I got out with the doggie today and enjoyed our time in the sunshine. I think tomorrow we'll try to run. I don't know how long it will last for me, but I'm going to try. It's been a month since I last ran. The doggie has apparently found the little bit of weight that I've lost. She needs to get out and get in the sunshine and run. I need to do that too.

I think my weight loss can be attributed to the lack of drinking. for some reason I haven't been too interested in it as of late, which is strange, giving the stress levels. That's usually when I want to have a cocktail. Whatever. I'll take it.

I realized this evening that I have 2.5 months. That means I've really got to work on getting things sorted and packed. I think if each week between now and then I take a different room and get it organized and packed, then I'll be OK. This week, I think I'm going to tackle the bathrooms. I'll get rid of some of the stuff that doesn't need to be hanging around. Go and get a couple of boxes that I can get ready. I suppose that bathrooms are an odd place to start, but they're small. Manageable. I guess I could do the spare room. That's easy enough. I also need to start going through the kitchen.

Have I mentioned that I'm getting rid of the plastic in my kitchen? I'm going to glass food storage. Plastics are bad for us. Very, very bad. So I'm getting rid of mine. Each pay day, I buy a few more pieces of glass.

I've got to get ready for bed. Which means drying my hair. More tomorrow y'all.

March 16, 2011

Evening Update

My dress for Oaks arrived today. My Sner made it for me, and I have to say...it's fantastic! She did a very good job, and it's fantastic. I think that pattern would make a very good LBD. She's making me another one with a white background, floral pattern. If she were feeling ambitious, she could do a black one too. Just sayin'...

Now for Oaks I just have to find a pair of shoes and decide upon the jewelry I want to wear. I also have to get the make-up situation taken care of. And the hair. I need to go see a professional and let them color my hair since it's such a mess. Maybe I'll do that over spring break. Go see someone that I don't have to explain things to because I'll never see them again. Hmmmmm...

Tomorrow is the last day of the afterschool reading program. Praise Jesus. I've enjoyed the extra paycheck, but I won't miss all of the extra work. To be honest, I phoned it in a bit this week. I didn't intend to, but then I just couldn't make myself do it.

I am beginning to fear that I am truly entering menopause. I woke up this morning at 1:00 drenched in sweat. It took at least half an hour for the overwhelming burning to go away.

Matt and I were talking about camping on the beach during spring break, but I can't find a campground on the beach. *sigh* I want to go to the beach more than I want to go camping. I do want to go camping, though. Before it gets ungodly hot. But I don't think that's going to happen this spring. We'll have to go this fall because we know that camping can't happen in the summer. We learned that last year.

March 15, 2011

Evening Update

I should be in the bed because I haven't done my work for tomorrow. I'm going to get up early and do it, but I haven't gone to bed yet.

Today was a better day than I expected it to be. I am always surprised when I'm in front of a classroom full of kids and it goes well. I'm never sure of what I'm doing and how it's going to work, but today it was a good day. I'm glad. I need those experiences. This year...the ugliness of it...has robbed me of confidence. But there are moments like today and yesterday when I realize that hey...I really do know what I'm doing. I'm not a total and complete fuck up here.

I had a big conversation with my boss today. I needed to tell him that I wasn't sure about my plans for next year before someone else did. He took it better than I thought he might. I hope that the goodwill holds because to be honest, I need it. I need that support right now when I don't know what's going to happen or where I'm going to go.

So overall...today was a win, to quote Charlie Sheen. I can't wait, however, to be home in 17 days. I'm going to relax, go to the beach, spend time with my girlfriends, get a new tattoo and spend time in New Orleans. What more could I ask for from a spring break?

March 11, 2011

Evening Update

Today was a better day. I was afraid that it was going to be awful, but it was actually really good. I think part of that might have been due to the fact that I got really, really good news about the project that I'm trying to get off the ground. Y'all think good thoughts about it because it's gonna be huge.

The news today has been dominated by news of the Japanese earthquake and tsunami. It is such a terrible tragedy that could easily be compounded. I think every one is most worried about the nuclear reactors that are in danger of core meltdown. Nuclear energy is safe and clear...under most circumstances. I believe that. We've had a few spectacular disasters, and to be sure, those disasters were disasters of epic proportion. There is no denying that, but there are hundreds of nuclear plants that work effectively and safely every day. There is no threat and no danger posed by them.

I don't know how you plan for what happened to do. They had off-site power. The secondary generators were off-site. But both the earthquake and then the tsunami overwhelmed those systems and back-ups. It's a waiting game. Tragedy upon tragedy upon tragedy.

My books arrived today! I think I'm going to use them to work with the boys next week, since I'm supposed to be planning the lessons. That's fine with me. I don't care about that part of it. I'm sure that I'm going to come up with something pretty cool. But whether other people feel the same way about it or not is another story. I'm going to try to not worry about it.

It's going to be a pretty weekend! The doggie and I are going to have plans! I'm excited about it. I'm also going to finish my Oaks hat. It's a month and a half away, but I want things taken care of and out of the way. I still need the shoes to go with the dress. I need to find a pin for the hip. I've got to get my bracelet cleaned.

March 10, 2011

Evening Update

Both of my goals for Lent are proving to be incredibly difficult. Once again I am not writing in my notebook. Maybe it doesn't really matter where I write, just that I write. I still don't know really what to write about it. Thinking. Thinking. Thinking.

The not bitching about my job is even harder. I slipped today. I'm still seething about what happened. Trying to let it go, but it has some uses. I have been cleaning. The floors have been swept and mopped which is big for me. I don't mind sweeping, but I hate mopping. So much so that I considered paying the lady who used to watch the cats (she cleaned houses for a living) to come in once a month to mop and dust. It would have been about $25. I think it would have been worth it, but who hires a cleaning lady for a dumpy apartment? The toilets have been cleaned, and the bathroom counters wiped down. The laundry is almost done, and what is finished is put away...although not ironed. Pretty sure that one will come back to bite me. All of that work? Due the white-hot anger I'm still feeling over something that happened at 10:15 this morning. *sigh*

But that's all I'm going to say about it.

I'm either going to be slightly cured of my pessimism and negativity at the end of 40 days, or I'm going to be an alcoholic.

My books still aren't here. I called amazon to inquire as to where my things where since the tracking they provided said that my books were still in Cincinnati. Long story short, the package left Cincinnati today and should be here in three days. Whaaaaaat?!?! I was bitchy enough that I now have a $10 credit at amazon. Wonder what I will spend it on?

It was snowing when I drove home from work today, which was a little startling. I know it's only March, and technically that means that we're still in the middle of winter. But ugh. Snow? Now? The upside is that we're supposed to have a lovely weekend. I've got a ton of things to do...as usual...but I'm hoping to get out and enjoy it just a little. Maybe take the doggie for a walk around the lake. I almost said take the doggie for a hike, but we are water-logged, which means that a hike would be a slippery, muddy mess.

I'm going to bed. More tomorrow night after I've cleaned of the dining room table and the couch, vacuumed, and dusted. Then my house will be clean and all I will really need to do for spring cleaning is scrub the baseboards because when I was looking at them this evening...they are gross.

March 9, 2011

Evening Update

Today is the first day of Lent. Even though I am not observant, I like the idea of setting a goal for one's self and following through. In thinking about my life, I realize that there are things I could practice eliminating from my life and things I could add. So. For the next 40 days, I'm subtracting one thing from my life and I'm adding one thing.

I won't be bitching about my job until Easter, and I hope that I will be broken of that habit. Not bitching about it doesn't mean that I don't still hate it and that there aren't a million little deaths every day. It just means that whinging about it doesn't change it, and it gets tiresome. I tend to the negative, and the situation at my job makes it incredibly easy for me to go even further down that road. Today was the first test because from the start, today could have been like any other day. I still thought it, but I didn't give voice to it. The only one tortured by the difficulty of the day was me, and I'm hoping that by the time Lent is over, I won't be torturing even myself. Hopefully in 40 some odd days, I will be able to stop myself before I even go there. (I won't even complain about the job here)

So that's the thing that I'm letting fall away, which brings us to the thing that I'm adding to my life in the coming days. I've thought about what I really wanted to do, what I've been missing, what I need. Two weekends ago, I went by one of the local Borders that is going out of business. I was able to pick up 3 of the notebooks that I prefer to write in for 40% off. I probably should have bought more, and I think I'll swing by there again this weekend to see what's still left. It struck me as I was picking up those notebooks that I don't write any more. I don't know what I do, but I don't write.

So. From now until Easter, I'm planning to write every day. At least three pages in my notebook each day. Except today. Today I'm writing here because I needed to line things out a little bit. I needed to put my plans out there into the world. Provide myself with some accountability. And perhaps some support. And I didn't really know what to write about today.

I ordered a couple of books from Amazon last week; one of them anticipating getting back into writing and needing some thoughts to spur me. I'm rusty I think. Those books aren't here yet. I'm not quite sure what to write about tonight. I have a lot of thoughts about the way teachers are being treated in this country right now, but I don't know if I want to invite negativity into my life. Maybe tomorrow night.

It has rained all night and all day. I'm hoping that is what is contributing to my extreme fatigue. When I got home, I literally fell asleep in my chair eating my dinner snack. I took an hour nap and should head back to the bed now, but I wanted to see what John Stewart has to say tonight. He's had some pretty insightful commentary the last couple of weeks. I also think the changed weather must be at the root of the incredible headache I've had all day. It was vision-altering that was so bad, and I have been nauseous all day long. I need to take something again now and remember to use my neti pot in the morning.

I am ready for the rain to be over. I have a brand new camera that I'm dying to take out for a spin. I won't be buying another camera for quite some time. Even though I have no idea how to really use all of its fabulous features, I can't wait to play with it. It's a hybrid, which means that it's a P&S with a super zoom. Options to do manual and automatic focus. Lots of different features to use for pictures, and I want to get really proficient at using the thing.