August 2010
August 24, 2010
Evening Update
It was another crappy day. One of the worst so in a long time. This year is feeling like the first year here, and I am so not enjoying that. It's too early in the year for it to be feeling like this, and I've come way too far for it to be this all over again.
Taught today. I'm not bragging when i say that classroom management has never been an issue for me. It's not hard to control a classroom. It's about consistency and not letting things slide. It's about sticking to what you want from students and not accepting less. If they're not supposed to have their head down, then they don't have their head down. If they're not supposed to blurt out, then you don't recognize those who do, only paying attention to those who are giving you what you want. I was correcting a teacher and correcting students today. I don't know if the teacher was comfortable with it, but I didn't know what else to do other than to remind her AND the students in the moment. I'll be back in that room again and then in another room where a teacher is struggling with classroom management. If you can get that down, then you don't have any other problems.
I notice when I spend more time here, things are rough elsewhere. It's like I have a need to vent to put things out there so they don't eat me alive.
I've been thinking a lot about Katrina lately. I need to do some writing about that this weekend. In addition to doing more writing on the stupid dissertation. I've got to get it finished.
I'm ready to be home. Me and this little black dog are missing home.
August 23, 2010
Evening Update
Officially I am irritated. It didn't get better after going to bed, and it has gotten worse today. I'm sure it's PMS. Completely and totally sure that's at least the biggest part of it. But there's more to it. If I were being honest, it dates back to June and things that started happening then. I just don't know if I have the energy to deal with it, you know? So I'll let it continue to frustrate me...until...
I was going to write a bunch more but I've been chatting on facebook with peeps, and there's too much to say right this minute. Maybe Friday.
August 22, 2010
Evening Update
I can no longer deny it. I've messed up my shoulder again. It's been irritated because of the things that my job requires at the beginning of the year. But yesterday. I can tell you the exact moment that I put the nail in the coffin. Yesterday I was grabbing a 27 pound box of cat litter out of the floorboard, and as I pulled back with it, I felt the ripple. I thought to myself then, "Oh. That's not going to be good." And wonder of oh wonders, it hasn't been. Need to get another ice pack and use my tens unit. *sigh*
The first week of school is over. It was pretty good I think. I wound up teaching five periods each day (there are only five periods in a day) because we had a new hire decide to not show up. He was actually there on Friday but has since decided to resign. Good for him. Ridiculous.
When I have that reaction, I have to remind myself that not every one is cut out for middle school and not every one is meant to work with the kids at our school. In other places, I believe they can be successful. And if they don't want to work with our kids, if they don't believe in them, then those kids are better off with someone else. That, of course, means I'll be teaching again this coming week. I can't tomorrow because there are other things I need to do, but Tuesday. Wednesday. Hopefully we'll have hired a new teacher by then.
I know this is just the PMS talking, but I'm irritated. I have these fantasies about applying for jobs in MS and moving home at Christmas. Hell even now. I'll have my dissertation done, and I won't have to worry about all the things that are on my plate right now.
Need to go to bed now so I can get up early.
August 14, 2010
Evening Update
I completed the last of my dissertation interviews today. School starts on Tuesday but I've got to find time this week to get all of the interviews transcribed. My goal is to have the whole shooting match finished by September 17th. That means I will have a final defense on October 14/15. That's the plan, I think.
I started looking at invitations for a graduation party this evening. Not that I think they'll be necessary. I'll post something on facebook that invites all the peeps to come on out to Gumbo Acres for the food, BYOB drinks, and bon fire (hear that PA? You gonna need to get that organized). I'll do the graduation announcements so an invitation isn't a necessicity.
I'm beginning to believe that I might actually be able to pull this thing off. I've had some moments...some serious breakdowns and panic attacks in the last month, but I see the light coming. I just have to dedicate myself to getting the whole thing done. And paying for it. Ugh. But that's what extra days pay are for. If I send those checks directly to USM, that will almost take care of it all. If I figure otu some PDs to attend for stipend in the next couple of months, that will wrap it all up. This last semester is incredibly expensive. Between the fees and the out-of-state tuition, it's killing me.
The upside is that I've done a whole lot of writing. While I haven't been doing it here, it's filling up my writer's notebook, and that's a good thing. There are a couple of things that I know I need to spend a little more time with, and I'm hoping that as soon as I get this dissertation finished, I'll move on to getting those things done. One of them will be a Christmas pressie. I've been thinking for a long time that I'd like to make presents of my writing, but I haven't found just the right thing to write about, but now I've got a couple of ideas.
While I was out and about today, I kept thinking that I needed to make time to stop and take pictures of the tobacco. Some of the plants are a lovely yellow. As I was coming back from Lexington today, I decided to come back the long way. There were lots of places that I wanted to stop and take pictures, but there were not safe places to pull off the road. Trust me, I was looking and I would have turned around to do it.
The PA has taken off the week of his birthday. He says he's coming to visit me whether I want him to or not. I want him to visit. I'd told him not to come because I would be working on my dissertation, but if he understands that I've got work to do and still wants to come, then I want him to come.
Last Updated October 3, 2010
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