Do you remember that phone commercial from a couple of years ago that had the girl talking about how she finally knew she was over the boy because she deleted him from her phone? I deleted the boy from my phone this afternoon. We sent a few text messages back and forth today, but I had asked him to call me. He didn't. So. I get it. I'm not stupid. At the same time, it would be really nice to just have someone say, hey...it didn't work for me. OK; I understand. None of this bullshit.

I'm not going to say all of those things that I've said here a million times before, but know that I'm thinking them. I don't get it; I don't understand it; I'm confused. And it all fucking sucks.

April 24, 2007

The boy was off last night, but he had a bad day at work. Which means he needed "me" time. I am beginning to be very frustrated with this relationship, which means I'm getting awfully close to being done with this relationship. It's early in a relationship; I shouldn't be frustrated yet. The weather is supposed to be awful here tonight.

I played with my puppy so she is passed out in her crate. I'm actually pretty tired too, so I think I'll be heading to sleep here real soon.Tomorrow night Rick Bragg is speaking at USM. I'm planning on going. He's supposed to talk about writing memoir, which is always of interest to me.

For some reason I'm watching a History Channel program about logging. I was thinking about doing a little writing about that, but not tonight.Today was administrative professionals day. Nada from my bosses. It's to be expected I suppose.

the big boss has been out the last day and a half because his mother was in the hospital, and Jason was in Perry county for a bid opening. Bigger fish to fry. *sigh*

April 23, 2007

I never quite know what to make of the boy. He keeps me pretty off-balance, and I don't know that I like that. I happened to meet another boy Saturday night, but there just wasn't that thing for me. I didn't find him very attractive, and his personality was a bit too abrasive for me. Then again, I didn't get to talk to him much. Maybe it would be different if he and I spent some time chatting. I don't know. I just wish the boy were around more often.

My right arch is killing me. I'm hoping that it's just the shoes I chose to wear today. They weren't the most comfortable. Cute, but not real good for your footsies.I'm pretty sure that I'm going to Jazzfest this weekend. On Saturday Rod Stewart is playing, as is Bonnie Raitt. The only problem is that they're playing at the same time. I think, though, that if I go, I'll be parking my ass in front of the Acura stage to watch Rod Stewart. I've seen Bonnie Raitt, and while I love her, I've not see Stewart. Johnny Rivers plays before Stewart, and with all of those folks at Jazzfest, I think it might be best to just stay put. I haven't asked Beth if she's going with me or not, so I might be headed over on my own.

I'm not sure what I'm going to do with my puppy. I don't want to leave her in the house all day by herself. Poor thing. If Beth doesn't go, I might ask if I can bring her out there. Or my friend Polly has said that I can bring her by the house and drop her off there.

My puppy is getting big. We went to a pool party this weekend, and she was in the pool twice. The first time I put her in the water with me, and the second time, I think she just slipped in. Poor thing. She likes water, though. Tonight when I was watering the plants (after I did myself a little container garden), she was biting at the water hose, drinking down the water. We had to take a bath this afternoon because she smelled like pool water and pee. Poor baby. Good thing she likes baths. She will sit when I tell her to, even if it's in the tub. Anyway. It's time for us to go to bed.

April 16, 2007

Are you grief-stricken by the VA Tech shootings? I am dumb-founded. I do not know why these things hit me so hard. I think it is perhaps because I tend to be empathetic. Or highly suggestible. Or something. Maybe that psychic in New Orleans was right when she said I have abilities that are untapped. I don't know. Whatever it is, I have felt this keenly all day.I am sadden for the students, and those parents, and the university community, and the family of the shooter...and all of us.

I don't really care about the police response. I fleetingly wonder what might have been done differently, what went wrong. But rather, what I want to know is why this person did this...why he felt the need to hurt so many people? What is wrong with us that we can treat other people so cruelly? How do we come to this point as a society? Man's inhumanity to man, I suppose is what's at the root of my questioning. I see no easy answers. We are disconnected and disjointed, the bonds that hold us together as a society are fragile and tenuous at best. We don't know our neighbors, and we don't bother to care for those around us. We are isolated and adrift. How do we possibly get back together? (forgive my scatteredness. I really am upset about this)

April 15, 2007

My puppy and I spent most of the day sleeping. We got up around around 6:30 to go out to potty, and then went back to bed. We got up again around 11:00. And then around 2:30, we took a nap. Slept until 5:00. I'm ready to go back to bed now.

So, I've decided that the boy's name is the Transient Boy. I sent him a message yesterday that was basically, what the hell is going on? I mean, I haven't seen him in two weeks, and he hadn't responded to the text I sent on Thursday or the one I sent on Friday. I just said that if things had changed, to let me know...I understand such things. His response was GOOD GOD NO. He's just busy. OK. I understand. Still find it annoying. I've decided that unless he communicates with me, then I can't be bothered.

My puppy is getting bigger. It's no longer quite so easy to pick her up. She's still not big enough to quite jump up in the chair with me, although she really, really wants to. Just can't quite do it. I expect that by the end of the week, she'll be able to hop right up here with me. I think she's hungry right now, but I don't know if I want to feed her right before bedtime.

Hmmmmm...My period is starting. I know you want to know this. I was actually counting the days because last month I remembered to write down when it started, and I have found that I have about a 36 day cycle. That's pretty long. Wow. As long as it comes, I suppose that's all that matters.

On that note, my puppy and I are going to bed. We didn't do laundry this weekend so clothes for tomorrow will be interesting. *sigh*

April 14, 2007

What an awful storm this morning/afternoon. I have some pictures of the rain, but I'll have to save them for a bit. I need to do some photo albums...been awhile since I have put any pics up. The rain was so bad that I had to move the car...very carefully from the front yard to the back. That involved driving across the front yard. Good thing that the neighbor wasn't home.

Cobbler and I went to bed during the second round of storms. We decided to go to bed after lightning struck very near to the house. I screamed and Cobbler jumped up in my lap. She couldn't quite decide if she wanted to be in my lap or if she wanted to be in her crate. It was kinda funny that during the middle of the first storm, she thought she needed to go out. We went on to the porch but she wouldn't go out into the rain. So she peed on the porch. *sigh* I suppose I'll get the hose tomorrow and wash that off.

Finally did my taxes the other night. Good thing, as I'm getting a fat return. It'll go to pay some bills...and pay for the small fuzz's spaying, which will need to be done in about a month and a half. I don't know what I was waiting for. It took all of about 15 minutes to do it. (It's good to be a student)

I lost my credit card last night. Or I didn't get it back when I paid for my drinks. I don't know. Fortunately there were no other charges on it before I called to report it missing. I don't know how I didn't see that I didn't have it before I left the bar. *sigh* Silly girl.

What do y'all think of this whole Don Imus mess? I have to say that I believe what he said was offensive, and I think that he should have apologized. I do not, though, think that he should have been fired. That seems a little silly. It also seems a lot silly that the Rev. Al Sharpton is saying that it's not enough, that it's only the beginning. Beginning of what? You cleaning your own house? I might have respect for Sharpton, if it seemed to me that he was actually working on making things better within his own community.

Haven't seen the boy, whom I think will be called the Itinerant Boy, in two weeks. He's been very busy with work (there have been several busts shown on tv in the last week or so). He says he's still as interested as ever, but that whole work thing gets in the way. Suck.

Did you know that Oreo is making a limited edition Strawberry Milkshake cookie out? I picked them up, and I think I'm going to get in the shower, then have some cookies and milk for dinner.

April 11, 2007

I still haven't done my taxes yet. I don't know what's wrong with me.There's just this general sense of ennui. Not just about the taxes, but life in general.

My pupper dog is good. She's been extremely sweet, and I love her lots. Today she had no accidents in her crate, which is a really good thing.

Haven't seen the boy in almost two weeks. He's been working, and I totally believe that. He said maybe Friday or Saturday...and since I am now apparently free, I suppose that's good. More tomorrow. Sorry.

April 2 , 2007

I'm not sure when I'll be able to update the page again. We had a pretty bad storm yesterday, with lightning strike very near the house. After that happened, my internet connection quit working. I called comcast this morning, and the best they can figure is that my modem was fried by a static discharge. I guess. The soonest they will get here to fix it is Thursday afternoon. *sigh*

The customer service center told me to take the modem to the local center and exchange it, see if that fixed the problem. So I did. And the local center told me that they don't exchange modems across the counter...after I'd waited half an hour and wasted that time on my lunch break. *sigh*

So yeah. We'll see.

My puppy is doing great. She's going to bed when I tell her, and she's playing in her crate. She's going outside to potty, and she's walking nicely on her leash. She's also sleeping through the night. The only problem is that she apparently cries most of the morning. I put her in the crate, and she cries. I got up this morning and took her for two walks before she had go in her crate...hoping that if she was tired, it would be better. Not quite. Maybe we'll try a longer walk in the morning. (So far we've only been doing the little half block...maybe we'll do two blocks in the morning)

My babies are getting along, I think. Peach and Cobbler were actually playing together a little this evening. Or Cobbler was trying to play with Peach and Peach was hissing at Cobbler. They both wanted to play with the same ball. Cobbler just misses her brothers and sisters I think. She so wants someone to play with her.

The boy finally came to see me last night. Heard from him today but that was because I sent him a message first. Don't think I'll do that again. I think the older I get, the more I want to be in some sort of relationship. I don't know about something serious or heavy, but I do want to have someone that I can spend time with on a regular basis. You know? I've been really tired of being alone for a long time. I don't know if the boy is the one who will end that thing, but I'm not averse to it the way I used to be...and that's saying something. I don't know when I'll see him again.

Today was opening day for baseball. I watched the Cards lose last night, and I'm sure that my Royals lost to the Red Sox today. Dammit. I don't know yet, though, because I didn't have internet to check the game. *sigh*